1. Please stop worrying that you’ve gone from a size 6 to a size 8. That extra size has at least filled in your bra a tiny bit. Hey, in ten years you’re going to have a baby and then you’ll see what fat looks like babes! Soz!
2. Stop with the eye make up. It doesn’t make you look unique, alternative or grown up; you look like you’ve been in a boxing ring. Believe people when they tell you that you really don’t need to wear make up and yes, your skin WILL suffer. Stubborn cow.
3. Your best friends are going to pretend to pick you up for prom in that (tacky) pink limo and then strand you. They’re just jealous that the boy you all liked asked you to prom. Instead of declining his invitation and then crying all summer over the prom drama, go with him. You’ll probably fall out of touch with him but you’re going to with your “best friends” anyway. Man up, smack on a smile and enjoy your last day of being a teenie bop before the real world lands at your feet.
4. ENOUGH OF THE DRAMA LLAMA
5. You’re going to get your heart broken one day. It might feel like love but it won’t be!
6. During this heartbreak you’re going to hear gossip about things you supposedly did or said to your ex. This is fairly typical of humans at any age. You’re going to do the right thing and not react or tell anyone what really happened. You’re wise enough to know that there are two sides to a story but it’s nobody else’s business. The friends who are worth keeping will still be there in the end! That’s life.
7. Don’t stop writing. At some point you’re going to (unbelievably) take a long break from your most favourite hobby because ONE pointless person tells you that you’re not any good at it and that it’s “lame” but here’s a fun fact: they’re lame and you’re lame if you quit. K babes?
8. You’re not a tearaway, you’re just going through a tough time and people forget how young you are sometimes. You’re being a bit irrational, naive and making some bad decisions but you’re actually very well behaved compared to most kids that age. Just calm it slightly.
9. Visit your Silly Nan more often. She’s not going to be around for much longer; it feels like she is going to be around forever but you don’t have as much time as you imagine.
10. Do you really need to sit on a hill every Friday night with your friends and drink until one of you pukes? You’re a kid. Go home and spend it with your family or have a sleepover. You may think your an adult but when you’re a REAL adult you’re going to remember that most weekends were spent drinking a stupid amount of cheap cider and pretending to be more drunk than you really were. It’s normal to behave this way from time to time but let your parents know you’re safe at least? “I’m not nagging. I just care.” They meant that. Honest!
11. Don’t lose ambition or motivation. You can be exactly what you want to be and you’ll still want to be the same thing in 10 to 15 years so just.don’t.quit.
12. Dying your hair black is going to make you cry. It was also the start of an emo phase. Trust me, you DON’T want that photographic evidence.
13. You’re going to meet the most amazing friends in your twenties, don’t fuss so much over your girl friends at school. “Ain’t nobody got time for that.” (You’ll understand that quote one day too)
14. Do your damn homework. (Yes, I know I sound like Mum)
15. Don’t take classical civilisation as a GCSE. Why did you even take it? Because you thought it was going to be an easy lesson to take for something you’ll never even have to use. It’s that or geography right? Pick geography.
16. You never did need to use classical civilisation. Just so you know.
17. Thank your English teacher for being supportive. She always told you to never quit writing. It doesn’t matter that her breath smells of coffee, you’d need to drink buckets of the stuff too if you were teaching YOU. She’s a babe.
18. You’re going to meet your husband at eighteen, but you’re going to be best friends until you are twenty. You’re going to be yourself and it’s going to pay off. That’s how much people love you when you’re being YOURSELF.
19. So many people are going to come and go. Some you can’t imagine life without! Don’t let it break you when that time comes as you’re going to meet some really amazing people that are much better suited. Never stop trying to achieve, be fierce (when the time is right) and “never let anyone dull your sparkle” are words to live by.